Me - July 2013 -

In May of 2012, I wrote a little essay, entitled "Who am I, May 2012".
I currently felt the need to revisit that self-examination having had evolved quite substantially in the past year.

I remember being a little girl, vacillating between wanting to be a stay-at-home mom, and also wanting to be a physician. When I escaped through my reading into the James Harriott novels; I longed to be a country vet.
No matter the profession I desired to have; one goal has maintained a constant: I want to help others.
The past few years, I gave of myself to many. I have rarely been selfish with cash or anything else. But I have longed to serve in a deeper way.

I attempted to serve my fellow human by being active in political causes. Frankly, when I-502 passed, it took the wind out of my activism sails. Although I was happy that I was able to personally register a few voters, the spirit of contention that is present in so many in the activism paradigm brings the phrase "pathologically anti-authoritarian" to mind.

That is not me. I follow the rules. To the letter of the law. Always have tried, always will. I feel awful when I don't. It took me literally being knocked on my behind to remember who I was.

When I remembered who I was: A grandma of three, a mom of three, a woman who values her fellow human being (especially the children) and more than that; values God beyond anything else in this world or the next, it became imperative that I explore my relationship with my Heavenly Father. To this end, I prayed and asked how to become closer to my Heavenly Father, and my Savior Jesus Christ.

This spring I was baptized after a personal revelation lead me to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.
So, now, when I look at myself and who I am; I include the fact that I am a Latter-Day Saint. But I also maintain many of the goals and ideals that I did before my religious conversion.

I do not believe in judging other people.
I believe in doing everything within my power to help my fellow man. We are our brother's keepers. We are not in this life alone. I will always give the shirt off my back (don't worry, I have a habit of wearing several layers ;) ) for the shivering homeless person. That is who I am.

I have been in a situation where I thought I had it all: The house, two jobs, three kids and a husband.
I have been homeless without anything, temporally. I have been closer to God when I was living out of my car at a Montana rest area for eight days. God sent me my "lightehouses" that eventually were to lead me to the "ultimate lightehouse": Jesus Christ. The Light and the Life. My Savior.

God showed me the way home. I am looking forward to the rest of my journey. I have more than half of my life ahead of me. It is bound to be an incredible journey.

My current interests still include independent sustainable permaculture. Organic food production and alternative holistic medicine as well.  I long to build Lightehouse living areas throughout the world. Hemp based & holistic permaculture. I am still interested in helping others step away from the prescription drug paradigm. As I further my own rehabilitation, I am continuing to write about the holistic changes I am making in my life and I am sharing the results in an attempt to help others.


I am still actively in the process of rehabilitating my own body and mind. My physical and mental health are gaining as much of a testimony as my spiritual health has. I am actively involved in helping my body catch up with the energy that my brain has felt during the time of my conversion.

I am enjoying getting to know new friends, but the words of a  Girl Scout song rings in my ears:

Make new friends,
but keep the old.
One is silver,
the other is gold.

A circle is round,
it has no end.
That's how long,
I will be your friend.

For those wonderful friends who have been there for me; through whatever decisions I have made, without judging, even when it was hard not to: I love you with all my heart and soul. You are forever part of my "intentional family."

For my blood family; those who have experienced the worse brunt of my sinful actions throughout my life, to them I continue to ask their forgiveness. I am so sorry it took me so long to remember the mom and grandma that I long to be.

For those who are just getting to know me, you know a person who has lived many lives. Feel free to ask me anything. I am anything but shy. But my heart is tender. It's been broken.
My Wonderful and Forgiving Heavenly Father currently holds it in his loving hands.

May the Heavenly Love and White Lighte of the Holy Spirit embrace all of you.

February 2013: Plans and Reflections

Wow, this past year was a doozy!

Activism and cannabis... they both had their way with me in ways I would rather not admit. But, in order to learn and grow, that is just what I must do.

Drama. Feeling rather embarrassed and humiliated by my OWN actions. Shame on me. Enough said.

Wanting to believe; wanting to be loved.

Then, having the supposed love, yet wanting to be me.
Wanting to move on with my life.

After the failed fight against 502 due to it's discriminatory wording against young adults as well as unreasonable DUI provisions; the thought of further "activism" to that extent, exhausts me.

After devoting my life; day and night, to the cannabis news business for nearly six months, I am over it.
I give props to those who do it. I can't.


I LOVE to write. I LOVE to research and investigate and convey that information in written form to disseminate to others. I LOVE that.

I am NOT, nor have ever been, a one topic writer. Frankly, I am FAR too opinionated to be!

I have refrained from writing, and publishing much on the net, for the past 4 or so months. Many of the reasons for this are now becoming known. One of them was that I had no computer. Mine died days before my 46 birthday. Promises to replace it were empty ones. I always can depend on the Universe, and it came through for me with a winning bid on a little netbook for only $65 (before $15 shipping).

Whilst in my off-computer time, I wrote over two thousand pages longhand. I am using those pages as a jump-off point for several pieces.

I will still write about the sacred herb; but it isn't the only thing that I am concerned about. It is only a piece.
There are other parts of life, like children, animals, traveling and enlightenment that I enjoy and would love to share with others through my words.

I am working on a couple of exciting projects about cannabis, though. Three pamphlet-size books have been written, and are being transcribed.

The series is the basics of cannabis edibles by Gma Maggic 420, with a price point of $4.20, printed on hemp, small enough to ship by first class mail but packed with information.

"The Poor Girls' Guide: to Basic Cannabis Cooking", "The Poor Girls' Guide: to Cannabis Tinctures and Topicals" and "The Poor Girls' Guide: to Full Extract Cannabis Oils" should all be available no later than April 20, 2014.

So, I will be quite busy.... writing and doing what I love. I am still working on the books of my travels, as well as working on more travels ahead.

...and please remember: PLEASE talk to strangers, they could be one of your next best friends!!!

Love and Lighte!!